When I graduated from pharmacy school, I already knew that I was in trouble. I was looking at many years of a lot of talk…but not a lot of action.

But I didn’t know that quite yet. All I knew at that moment was what I DIDN’T want.

I could already feel myself clenching up at the idea of doing the same job, day after day, year after year until retirement. No way.

Maybe I could make it work for a while, though…I told myself.  I’d just keep the big-time paying corporate thing for a little while, get my life under control—a year or two tops. Then I’d take big action and do big things. Surely! 

(And besides, wasn’t it time for me to become an ADULT?)

Give it a couple of years, I said. Surely by then I’d have gotten the bolt-from-the-blue about my life’s purpose, I said.

Wrong. No epiphany showed up yet. (I was still the same job, though….)

But the pressure was high and the pain was mounting at the job. I knew I had to do something.

(Of course, everything seemed to be almost tolerable every couple of weeks when the big-ass paychecks rolled in….but ONLY then..)

It just got too easy to stay. Too easy to keep collecting the money while being all righteous about how I was above all that, how I was above all of this corporate nonsense. 

(After all, I was going kick this job to the curb and show everyone anyway, right? Riiiight?)

Too bad that it all seemed to be a lot of talk and not a whole lot of action…

The longer it went on, the more that the job became more than just a lot of stress. I felt as though I was betraying myself.

I know that’s a strong word, but it is the only one that fit.

I was a fraud. And I WAS betraying myself. By knowing better but not DOING better. Knowing what I needed to do but taking little or NO action. 

That was when I knew something had to happen. Sure, there were many moments where I had a feeling….but by then it got too big to ignore anymore.

Nothing is worth lying to yourself about that. I don’t care about the prestige, the security, the money.

NOTHING is worth not being who you are. THIS is what you need to know.

After that, I took action. Got behind my beliefs. And made BIG things happen.

Once I understood what was at stake—AND what I could do about it to make it AMAZING instead of miserable, I took the leap.

And the cool part? Anyone can do it, too.

What has been your experience here? Ever had a moment where it all became clear, both what you didn’t want AND what you DID want? Tell me about it!

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1 Comment on I Betrayed Myself (The REAL Cost of The 9-5)

  1. Merri Rohner
    July 3, 2016 at 10:26 am (12 months ago)

    Yes! There are so many that I am embarrassed to admit it! Thank you for calling the question! Love this!

    Reply

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